My thoughts later drifted off to Hariet. She had called and sent me messages of which I ignored. The height of it was when she apologized for getting close to me and also referred to the moment in her car the evening of Tessy’s birthday. I know that I have done her wrong by going dark on her; she didn’t deserve the way I treated her. As I thought about it, I realized that at that moment, I was no different from her sister.
I wouldn’t deny that throughout the moment Hariet and I got close that I didn’t develop a soft spot for her. I did and sometimes wished that I met her first before Tolu. I wish she would forgive me after this.
I must have drifted off to sleep from my thoughts as I woke up to Tolu seeing a program on the tele. She had changed from her former traditional outfit to a denin short and a tank top with a jacket. I yawned before heading off to empty my bladder with my woody leading the way. I didn’t bother hiding it.
“Have had anything to eat?” I asked coming back to the sitting room.
“No, I’m not hungry.” She replied her eyes still on the television.
She looked a whole better than when she walked in the first time. I didn’t want to push her so I went back to my former position and picked my phone. After some moments of silence, she turned down the volume of the television and cleared her throat.
“Toby can we talk?” she asked.
“Sure.” I replied eager to hear what she has to say.
“I can’t stay away again Toby,” she started, “I want to come back home.”
“Have you been away?” I asked. “I didn’t notice.”
“Toby I’m very sorry for what happened. I had feelings for you, I still do.” She started before I cut her short.
“No you don’t, you have a boyfriend.” I retorted. “Tolu let’s just get something clear and forget about all this. Whatever happened was in the past, I hold it not against you, at least I learnt a lesson from it. You don’t need to punish yourself over that, free your mind and come back to your house but I don’t promise you that things will return to how they were before.”
“Toby,” she started with clouded eyes. “I am very sorry. I don’t have a boyfriend. I was just running away from you; fighting the feelings I had for you.”
I looked at her like ‘she should try convincing me with the lies again’ before taking my eyes to the television. I really hate when it seems like I am being hard hearted to people’s plea especially when they are asking for my forgiveness over some wrongs.
“Toby please,” she continued, “I can’t go on like this. I …..” she started before I stood up and walked over to her.
“T listen to me,” I began looking into her eyes. “When you stepped in here I know you have suffered enough. Don’t make it look like I am being hard hearted to your pleas. I have forgiven you.” I concluded holding her hands, how I so much wanted her to stop pleading.
“But things can’t go back to how they used to be?” she asked a drop of tears rolling down her eyes.
“I can’t promise you that.” I replied.
“But can I try to make it go back the way they were?”
“Don’t hurt yourself by doing that just let things be like before the first time you hit my door.”
“Toby I can’t.” she started.
“You need to try.” I retorted. “That feeling is no more there.”
“I see it differently in your eyes and will do everything I can to bring things back to how it used to be. If at the end it didn’t work, then I will know that I tried.”
“So you are just going to hurt another guy because of your feelings for me?” I asked.
“There is nobody to hurt, I don’t have a boyfriend.” She insisted.
“The guy at Tessy’s birthday, I guess he is another of your preys?”
That must have touched a nerve as she looked at me a hint of hate in her eyes.
“Toby, he is not my boyfriend. He is just a friend that wanted to tag along to the party.” She explained.
“All those times you stayed away from home, where were you staying.” I asked looking into her eyes.
“I stayed in a hotel.”
“Tessy told me otherwise. Stop lying to me T. I have made my peace with all those stuff and want to forget that it ever happened.” I said sternly heading back to my former position.
We went silent for some time before she stood up. “I’m not lying to you and yes Tessy said otherwise because that was same thing I would have done. I am sorry I hurt you Toby.” She said calmly and headed for the door.